What you need to know when you have an affair with a married woman

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Monogamy may be the ‘default’ setting for relationships, but what this doesn’t take into account is human nature.

People have no control over who they are attracted to.

If you’re drawn to a particular female, you might be dissuaded to discover she is married.

But you might also become determined to have her – some guys love a challenge!

If you’re facing the prospect of being the third point in a love triangle, here are your essential tips.

— Never forget her married status

There are all sorts of places where you can plan an affair.

Apart from your paths crossing in social situations, you could actively seek wives for casual flings by registering with a website for local married women.

The delectable ladies you’ll meet on such a dating platform will have all submitted their details because they’re eager to commit to extra-marital fun.

You won’t encounter any timewasters.

But always bear in mind that she has also declared her married status.

She won’t be forgetting that in a hurry, so neither should you.

In placing her details online, albeit, in a secure environment, she is also taking a risk.

These matchmaking outlets are extremely popular, so she can never be 100% guaranteed to remain under the radar.

She’ll always wonder if any of her husband’s friends might be using the same online platform.

However, she could always use a ‘pretend’ username.

It would then be up to you to get to know her better and encourage her to open up about her feelings – and true identity!

— If she needs a little pause, take your time

You might assume an affair should be a whirlwind experience, with a lot of discreet dates leading to fabulous sex.

But she’ll need to take a step back now and again.

To her, there has to be a degree of keeping things cool to avoid discovery.

So whenever she states she needs a break, give her space.

If you keep pestering her, she’ll likely finish it.

— The fewer people who know, the better

An affair may involve three people, but if it is to succeed, the most fundamental rule of all is to ensure you are the only two people who ever know about it.

— You’re just an affair in her life

The woman you’re with is likely to be strong and independent.

She’ll be confident, and since she is effectively striving to keep two partners satisfied, she’ll look after her health and wellbeing.

Perhaps she’ll take pride in her appearance, seeking the most eye-catching clothes to wear and looking after her makeup and skin.

— Appreciate the consequences

Let’s face it: she is the one with most to lose.

If you’re a single guy and her husband was to find out, your only worry would be bumping into an incensed individual.

So you could take steps to stay out his way.

She could break up her marriage with all sorts of potential fallout, especially if there are children involved.

So what have you learned from our guide to having an affair?

Hopefully, you’ll appreciate that while it is exciting to be living this clandestine life, there are also risks.

A golden rule is to keep things in perspective.

Few married women become so besotted with their ‘bit on the side’ that they’d be willing to lose everything – husband, financial stability, custody of children, and so on – not to mention the negative impact on their self-esteem when the affair became public.

Just accept that this will probably be a fleeting romance – and enjoy it while it lasts.